John Wayne, my big girl pants and committing little murders…….

It is the start of a brand new year and with that comes the opportunity to welcome in hope, possibility and change.  At the beginning of each new year I tweak my blog site just ever so slightly and although I view my stories as a mere drop in the ocean, I will continue with them.   I am so very grateful for this open door with which to write.  May it never close…….

There is a lovely French saying, we are straying from the sheep,  which is what I have done in this post.  We are retracing the journey homeward from the USA and my previous blogs have been reflecting this time and although our next stop was intended to be Seattle Washington, necessity it seems, has petitioned this post be written instead.

*****

It is summer here in Australia.  The sun is shining hard, the flies are slow and the baking almost scorch drive heat has everyone seeking shade, iced water and the comfort of air-conditioning.  I had thought the writing of this post was being made more difficult by the heat but I know the soaring temperatures are not to blame.  It is the subject itself which is the problem as it draws one back to the juncture of those who seem starved of any moral code.

Occasionally I find when at a cross-roads with a profoundly troubling issue I sometimes ask myself this:  ‘what would John Wayne do!’    You may think this odd but those who know me will know of my love and deep respect (a shy code for obsession) with John Wayne and his movies so on the odd occasion, I seek the big man out.

And what would the Duke do if faced with a conundrum like this!  Well he would rear back and shout ‘fill your hands you son of a bitch’ then with reins clenched between his teeth and a Colt revolver in one hand and his signature Winchester rifle in the other, he would gallop down the oppressors on a magnificent chestnut quarter horse guns blazing for the fight of his life.

john-wayne-true-grit1

I have probably seen True Grit one hundred times and I will no doubt see it one hundred more…..

I have no horse nor a Colt or rifle but when fighting for something I deeply believe in, and especially when I know a sense of justice has been lost, I will always and very faithfully do this.  I pull on my big girl pants and with dignity and quiet respect I go in and I fight.  When I commit to take something on I do not take it lightly.  I take it on with all my heart, I get my facts straight and I do it.

I am also very mindful when passionately fighting for a cause that I do it with civility and with my moral compass pointed in the right direction.  I will never be deliberately unkind, I do not follow and I have no need to recruit.  I will not purposefully destroy another or their reputation and nor do I gossip, spread gossip or defame.  I never raise a hateful voice but I do however, most certainly raise my game!

This is the truth of my character and these attributes have very often been commended by many.   Very sadly however, this cannot be said of all which brings me to the point of this post as I am forever struck by how some will start an idea of you through gossip, and this seems especially true when you are not in a position to defend.   I very strongly believe that all battles undertaken should be honorable and just but it seems some people are often afforded the upper-hand in a situation and unfairly so.  With the trump card of opportunity and bereft of the morality handbook, they spread poison and doubt around which seeps itself through others like a cruel and pitiless migraine.  Having been force fed this endless diet of falsehoods, others will then allow this idea of you to fester even though it is not the truth of who you and your family are and nor is it the truth of a situation!

And I can assure you this.  There is little worse than being robbed your defence and your voice especially when lost to a thousand miles of sea.  Initially, this very destructive smear campaign gained momentum as soon as we crossed the Georgia state line but it became far more ruinous, and dangerously so, once we left American soil and it has been allowed to continue!  These attacks have been the intent of pure malice and although the lies and the very hateful words have had no wings, they have still managed journeys of many long miles.

I am committed to the principle that we are all entitled to our own opinions and our own voice and I will always fight for that belief.  What we are not allowed to do however, is use that voice to make up vile hate speeches then purposefully spread those offensive stories around to deliberately undermine and destroy.  Gossip is negative and it is very, very nasty and it serves absolutely no purpose other than to support the unkindness’s of those lacking self-worth.

The insensitive and venomous attacks upon us and our reputations have been unrelenting and they have bought about times where it has been near impossible to keep going given the gravity of what has and continues to be said.  The countless secular injustices of what happened were certainly afforded a very quick burial however these terrible slurs and the disparaging insults cast continue with devastating impact.  Such is the gift of perspective, you do eventually come to understand this is not about you or your family at all…….and it never was!   What it is however, is a sad and very deep reflection of the insecurities of those who have initiated this and who are purposefully continuing with it.

The American playwright and cartoonist Jules Feiffer refers to these sorts of attacks as ‘committing little murders’ and ‘nothing more than an assassination attempt by a coward’.   Words hold great power to uplift and they can also discourage but gossiping and boastful smear campaigning does not make one powerful and nor does it anoint some in status or pious elitism.   Believing you have gained some prestigious importance is just the bullshit you are telling yourself as the word prestigious is actually derived from the Latin praestigiosis which means ‘cunning’,  ‘deception’ and ‘conjurors trick’ which is precisely what gossip of this kind, as with any, is intended to do.

To be on the receiving end of all this has been torturous as it is a cruel and hateful way to attack but it is also a very sly and manipulative way for the weak and those with little credibility to garner support from others.  No doubt this is why it still continues almost 19 months on but is this what we do to people now!  Is this how we allow ourselves to behave simply because our immense hostility toward someone is so great that we will do and say anything to destroy them!

I do appreciate these terrible times as being symbolic, archetypal if you like of a chapter where nothing more than resentment and jealousy laid many of the foundations for much of what happened.  I have spent a great deal of time gently pulling at tiny clusters of threads and these unraveling strands have revealed much.  Also during this time, I have had many moments in which to ponder the emotion of hate and primarily of the resentment which continues to be directed toward us as I just cannot fathom this emotion.  Hate is very ugly and it does not sit easily with me.  I am very grateful it is not an emotion I feel toward others which is no doubt why the gravity of the sustained animosity toward us continues to shock me.  I do recognise however that the resentment of us and primarily what has transpired has all come from a place where some are driven only by their great insecurities, envy, spite and the disappointment they hold in themselves and their lives.  They gossip and spread hurt and damage simply because they do not feel good about themselves and hateful gossipers will always attack those whom they envy.   If only people could dismantle those terrible gods of jealousy and loathing which they so desperately cling to……….

It has been difficult not to hold a grudge as I am, by my own admission, an unmovable rock of stubbornness at times.  I am not sure, as much as I have tried, that forgiveness is the simple answer though because the act of clemency must be honorable and it must be deeply heartfelt.  I understand too that forgiveness is the only grace by which to move forward with just as I acknowledge that to forgive them is not forgiving the acts of vengeance and great harm but it will be the kindest way in which to clean these very deepest of wounds.

Committing to forgiveness is far more difficult though because you can only forgive when you are ready to do so and when your great sorrow and despair has all but dissipated.  Perhaps one day their private guilt will manifest into the grief that surely awaits those who perversely love nothing more than to purposefully cause trouble for others.  In saying that though, I do wish for them to find a composed dignity which will allow them to cease behaving in such brutally cruel ways for the life you lead does not always have to be the only life you live.

And holy cats.  Although I absolutely abhor violence on any level please don’t ever think I did not want to punch this pair in their big fat old vaginas because I DID!   Very thankfully, my self respect and the slow movement of time has somewhat restored my faith in human nature again.  As much as it all so aggressively very nearly unbuttoned everything I believe in, I will not let these unkind acts drive my heart.  I will always let a flood of kindness and light pour in no matter how much someone sets their course to annihilate me and my little part of the world.  I have learned to absorb these graceless attacks and I have found a meaning and good in all that has transpired since so for that, I will graciously thank them.

I appreciate too that those inflicting this wrath of hatred are not strong.   Devoid of moral boundaries they cannot and do not champion women’s rights and nor do they support or defend women’s issues and causes.   They do not reflect the ideals of strong women for strong women encourage, they have empathy and they are positive, confident and inspiring individuals.  Strong women have their own voices and therefore do not need to parrot, they do not scheme nor coerce wedges between others and they do not perceive other women as competition.  Strong women also have no need to rally followers through untruths, they do not boast and nor do they bully.  They do not shame with hateful insults and they do not measure their worth by how unkind they can be to others.

And you won’t find the truly strong women curled up fetal position in the corner sucking their thumb while constantly criticising  what anyone else would be immensely  grateful for as they are far too compelled in getting back up on their feet.  No matter how low someone drives them down, all while putting a heel in just for good measure, those women still get back up and they face the world.  Their courage and dignity will not allow them to give up because they are the ones who fight with their lives for what they believe in and they do it with absolute conviction every single time.   Strong women can always confidently go it alone when others are left to forlornly suckle on the saggy old dried up tit of resentment and they keep up the fight even when all seems impossibly lost.

I guess what I am saying in this post is simply this.  Please do not be taken in by gossip, by these hateful stories and by those who keep spreading them.  Do not believe all that you are being told either because gossipers always rely solely on cowardice and the desperate carelessness of their stories.  Do not feed the ugly monster of sly rumormongering by listening or by partaking in it because gossip and hateful stories will only die when reaching the ear of a person wise enough not to listen!

These attacks have been like a raging infection in that they are difficult to contain and they continue to spread.  The most sorrowful part of all for me however, has been the absolute joy and delight they have derived from this determined and purposeful act to destroy another!

Everyone, no matter who they are, has the right to be respected and be treated with civility and no one will ever truly understand the impact of something until it happens to them.  When you do not suffer it you cannot acknowledge how it feels so just take a moment to think how you would feel if placed in our position.   Reflect on how very one-sided this has been, on who has been constantly spreading this hateful gossip and also remember what unkindness they have said to you about other people as this, by their own boastful admissions, ain’t their first rodeo baby!

As much as many have urged us to come out, speak out and attack back against what has been said we will not.  As deeply distressing and insensitive as these attacks have been we do not need to defend as the truth of the matter will vindicate itself and refuge is sought in the knowledge of this.  We also do not have egos nor actions to protect therefore we have not, did not and will not disparage or defame.  Vilely attacking others does not show strength or power but it does shine a very big spotlight to the fact some have lost all class, credibility and self-worth.

In the end though, the harsher reality is very simply this – those who are maliciously gossiping to you have also gossiped about you.   Do not believe for a moment, regardless who you are or how much you have suddenly gained their obsequious attention, that you have never been on the receiving end of their very cruel tongues.  And believe me, my very wise ear heard it all!

So what would John Wayne have done.  Well, I’d like to think he would have sat back in his saddle in that laconic way he had about his handsome self and said ‘baby sister, I was born game and I intend to go out that way’……… (Marshal Reuben J. ‘Rooster’ Cogburn, True Grit).

Well me too Duke because at any give moment we all have the power to say ‘this is not how my story ends’.  Stories are those deeper reaches of what it means to be human and everyone has a story be it of hope, courage, love, new beginnings, pain or loss.  Some stories you read, some are kept deeply to the heart and some ‘stories’ are unkindly spread but no one ever has the right to tell your story but you!

And this is not how my story ends.  I will always fight for what I believe in even if it means I will be left to stand alone.  When other voices remain silent through fear of being shunned and ostracised, through fear of them believing they will be next in line for the brunt of cruel attacks or simply because they think someone else will speak up they are allowing bullying, injustice and inhumanity to thrive but my voice will always remain strong.   I may not win every battle but at least I have had the courage to stand up for what I believe in and in the end, that’s all that truly matters.

Be brave, be inspiring, be compassionate and be kind always and next stop, the lovely city on Puget Sound…..xx

johnwayne1

Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway……..John Wayne

36 thoughts on “John Wayne, my big girl pants and committing little murders…….

  1. 'Douge'

    I so admire your restraint; it just goes to prove how much stronger you are than they will ever be. Unfortunately, I haven’t got the same level of humanity and graciousness that you two have always displayed, and therefore cannot forgive that easily. To that end, I’ve forever kept my distance from these despicable cowards, and although I refuse to submit any names, because I know you wouldn’t want that, I’m careful who I accept as friends on Facebook (read what you like into that). Just know that your tormentors don’t know you both as the rest of the world do: two fantastic human beings whom we love dearly. I’m horrified that the bullying and smear campaign continued after you left here, but in retrospect I shouldn’t be, as that is the modus operandi of these arseholes. However, you have more than a colt and rifle: you have kindness, loving and righteousness, which can never be defeated. Stay strong because, despite what you may think at times, you’re still winning! We love you both dearly – keep the Dukes up!. xx

    1. Thank you so much for your very heartwarming comment Dougie. It was an arduous blog to write but unfortunately, given what has occurred it needed to be said. It was difficult to gather my thoughts for this post but I believe I have made my point.

      To say it has been deeply distressing to find the bullying and the very heinous smear campaigning continuing with a ripple effect is understated in the extreme. Perhaps they are somehow under the impression they have not done enough damage. We have lost everything that ever truly mattered but it seems for them this will never be enough. It would also appear they are compelled to have the people we know see us in the most unflattering light which they are manipulating but as you said, this is the modus operandi of those with little integrity. I guess you can roll a turd in glitter but underneath, it is still always going to be a turd……or substantial vagina.

      Of late I have found little time for social media given it has emphasised their attempt to drive another wedge between us and others. Their over exaggerated fawning, which is nauseating to say the very least, is difficult to witness given those they now flatter they had previously vocalised much unkindness about. Unfortunately, my self-imposed exile from social media only really affects me as I miss the great things my dear friends post but having said that, I do struggle to understand how some have been taken in by this very cringe worthy behavior. Time to get back on the horse though as I cannot allow their actions to affected me.

      This entire issue has been ugly to say the least but I still believe in hope, kindness, compassion and the belief that there really is good in all and that won’t ever change. Thank you both for your continued support, encouragement and love. It has meant the world to us. We love you guys xxx

      P.S……refining my ‘haymaker’ and ‘right hook’ as I type this xx

  2. Helen G.

    Thank you oceangirl for being the quiet voice that says: THIS IS NOT OK. We are supposed to be the kinder, gentler and fairer sex but some women are hell bent on destroying that image. We will never smash that glass ceiling when held back by such hate and envy of other women. I send you much love, stay strong and keep being that awesome voice. Helen xx.

    1. Thank you for your inspiring comment Helen. My thoughts would be that perhaps some women are just unable to move forward from the terrible behavior they have possibly displayed since childhood and school days. And you are absolutely correct in stating THIS IS NOT OKAY! My wish would be that women understood that other women are not competition and that when we empower, support and encourage each other so much that is positive and wonderful can be achieved. Take care x

  3. Ham Bone

    You bloody nailed it girl. Dead set your a little champion. Kid you are always going to be a winner and I would back you every single time. You’ve got more balls than most guys could handle and I reckon you could take on Danny fucking Greene and walk out of the ring 😀. Ladies need to start getting their shit together because men hate this sort of shit and if you tolerate your woman doing this to another woman then you are PISS FUCKING WEAK. You have my respect always girl. Ham Bone.

    1. Hello Ham Bone and thank you for your great comment.

      I don’t think I will take on Danny Green but I do most certainly appreciate your vote of confidence 🙂 You are correct when you state some women need to get their acts together! I don’t think anyone should have to tolerate this sort of behavior. Life is short and if we believe we come by this lifetime only once then we need to make our time here meaningful, significant and amazing and not waste it expending energy in trying to destroy others.

      And yes Ham Bone, there certainly were and still are some men very much lacking bollocks with regards to this entire issue. One even to the point of allowing his wife to constantly emasculate him in front of others and he also failed to support and speak up for his colleagues when his wife boasted to the echelon of how she was going to destroy a social group he had been invited in to by my husband and his friends. She had bragged of how she was going to shut the group down and she provided a very dishonest account as to what was occurring and being spoken of during these social encounters and when she did this, he sat there and said nothing at all in support of his friends!! I find that deeply shameful!

      Have yourself a great week, thank you again Ham Bone x

      1. Ham Bone

        Good on you love for having the courage to speak up. Very few of us truly live by our convictions but when we do we are the better bloody ones for it. What you put is a perfect example of a FUCKING PISS WEAK BLOKE. If his life is a fucking misery then he bloody deserves it. Suck shit arse hole for putting up with her especially when you don’t support your mates. You never not look after your mates!! Have a great one kiddo. Your mate Ham Bone

  4. Evan

    Hello oceangirl. I am not sure if you are aware but your message has been shared to other sites. Congratulations as this is where my wife read this.

    They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned but it is nothing compared to the fury of a nasty jealous woman. We know from first hand experience exactly what you have gone through as my wife experienced the exact same thing. She worked at her job very happily for almost 10 years. She was so popular and happy and she loved her job until someone new turned up. This is when all the trouble started.

    Her life was made a living hell simply because she is popular, kind, super attractive and smart. She was attacked and degraded on a daily basis and her life was made an absolute nightmare and no one, not one single so called ‘friend’ in her workplace stood up for her or said anything to these witches.

    Nothing has happened to these women either. My wife had to leave her job and they are still there attacking their next victim while her employer let’s it all happen and does nothing. Can you believe it. They crap on about ‘we will not tolerate bullying in our workplace’ but they let this happen on a daily basis.

    They have never been brought to account for what they did to my wife either. How pathetic. My wife still hurts from all this. It has taken a terrible toll and she still has to see psychologists etc all because of these bitches and I’m sorry I just can’t call them anything else.

    Thank you for saying what you did. No doubt you will cop it again for your courage to speak up but stuff them I say because people like this can give it but they can’t take it.

    My wife loved it and she laughed like I had not heard her laugh in ages so when you said you had wanted to punch them in their big fat fanny’s. ‘Let’s start a punch in the fat fanny movement ‘she said. How brilliant.

    Anyway, I hope you are okay and I hope you keep fighting that massive fight. Her psych says ‘just think how miserable their lives must be to have to do this to someone’ but really to me that is little comfort because I don’t think they really care about what they do.

    Anyway, thanks again and good luck, Evan

    1. Thank you for your lovely comment Evan. As with a couple of other comments I was so distressed to read what your wife has had to endure at the hands of other women. It really is deeply harrowing. I would also agree there would be little comfort in the statement from her treating psychologist about the ‘misery of the assailants lives’ as this does not even begin to acknowledge the distress and torment the victims have to endure.

      I will state that in my case the ‘organisation,’ as with your wife, also failed to take action when made fully aware of what happened and of what continues to happen! This lack of action and lack of acknowledgment has not only further encouraged the behavior of these women but it also continues to fully support and tolerate the vile actions of bullying. The organisation involved with my issue very clearly promotes their stance against unacceptable behavior and they promote their reputation for excellence however they fall very short when it comes to actually addressing issues such as this. For them, it is entirely about the protection and positive promotion of their image and nothing more!

      I am glad there was a little solace for your wife in the idea of the ‘fanny movement’ which made me smile. I do wish for you and your wife that there are happier days ahead Evan and from experience I can tell you that there are. Believe it or not, as difficult and dark as things may seem it does eventually get better.

      I wish you both all the best. Take great care x

  5. Bibs

    ‘When you wake up every morning to fight the same demons that left you wrecked from the night before then that my love, is true bravery’.

    Hugs, “the idealist”

  6. Jenna

    “They will hate you if you are beautiful. They will hate you if you are successful. They will hate you if you are right. They will hate you if you are popular. They will hate you when you get attention. They will hate you when people in their life like you. They will hate you if you worship a different version of their God. They will hate you if you are spiritual. They will hate you if you have courage. They will hate you if you have an opinion. They will hate you when people support you. They will hate you when they see you happy. Heck, they will hate you while they post prayers and religious quotes on Pinterest and Facebook. They just hate. However, remember this: They hate you because you represent something they feel they don’t have. It really isn’t about you. It is about the hatred they have for themselves. So smile today because there is something you are doing right that has a lot of people thinking about you.”

    ― Shannon L. Alder

  7. Lyn Lucas

    Damn! My reply disappeared into the ether …. anyway this was the gist of it, like I said: you and the Duke would have made a formidable pair, so continue to ride tall and shoot straight🤗. Your words are resonating with the good people in the world, so look ahead, be at peace and love well. Love & hugs, mum xx

  8. Mick

    Hi oceangirl. Wow, the comments have just blown my mind. Seems like you me and Evan have a lot in common. We have just spent 1 miserable year trying to handle the same thing. My wife was destroyed by 3 women to the point she could not leave the house or barely function. She went from a fun happy woman who everyone loved to an absolute mess. I found out how bad it got when taking my kids shopping to Westfield one Saturday. Unknown to me these bitches had the table near us in the food court and I could over hear them just attacking someone. Seriously they were just slaying this poor woman. One of them then said and I’ll never forget this “I won’t stop until every single person at that school and beyond hates that bitch as much as I do “. My little boy started to cry and I asked him what was up and he said “they are talking about mummy”. Far out. My heart just broke. I have never been so angry or heart broken at the same time. It just killed me. When I got home I only then realised how really bad the whole thing was. This was all happening during school drop off and pick up. It is probably the worst bullying I have ever seen and I got to hear more about it from other mothers when I went there and asked them as my wife just couldn’t say how bad it was. These were not stupid young 16 year olds either but normal women. No one stood up to them either and the school said they couldn’t do anything because it was not on school grounds and it was between adults not students. My wife and this was said to me by others did nothing at all to get them off side. They just took a hate to her for no reason at all. We all need to go to our local pollies and make them change some laws. As soon as we make bullying a hate crime the sooner it will stop. I reckon if I got these 3 in court they would shit themselves because they are gutless by themselves. Just pathetic pack animals. We had to change schools and everything and they tried to make it all happen to her there but I made sure it didn’t and it’s all good there now. Lisa is still having trouble with getting over it all but our family and friends have been excellent. Unreal hey. It was great that you wrote what you put up because Lisa’s mum saw it and we said “see mate your not alone”. Thanks from Mick and Lisa and the rug rats

    1. Dear Mick, Lisa and the rug rats. I have read and re-read your comment and it absolutely breaks my heart. What terrible suffering you have all endured however I am so very glad you have such a wonderful support network for Lisa.

      I cannot begin to understand how you must have felt with regards to the way in which you found out what was really happening. And your poor children. What a wicked thing to inflict upon such innocence. Honestly, it has been gut wrenching to read.

      I have to say Mick you are utterly correct in stating ‘they would shit themselves because they are gutless by themselves’ and I will relay something which happened to me with regards to such cowardly behavior.

      I returned to the USA alone but prior to this, I received a text message from one of these women which states – ‘I am one scary bitch!!!’. This message was not even meant for me as it had another woman’s name in the text but perhaps that message was destiny. I also believe that confident and positive women do not need to boast of such terrible conduct but as luck happened, I found out first hand that there was and is absolutely NOTHING scary at all about this craven woman.

      I pulled up in a car park next to a bog standard truck which was the same as every other hundred thousand plus bog standard white trucks in Georgia USA. Fate though, a fate which only gods allow and of which we have no control over is a funny thing and it also seems to have a very good sense of humor too :). The text sender emerged from the doors of a business and must have spotted our car given she well knew its unique color and registration plate. I had not noticed her but what I did notice was a woman scuttling about while trying to hold a weather jacket up over her head! Once she reached the driver’s door of the white truck she attempted to hoist herself up into the cab while still trying to hold the synthetic pastel colored jacket over her head.

      After much effort, she finally managed to scramble up into the cab while still unsuccessfully trying to hide then with no seat belt fastened, she attempted a very quick get-away. In her haste to depart she didn’t look behind herself whereby the horn on a large southern truck driven by very pissed off southern motorist gave her a start. This resulted in more fumbling, a stalling of the truck then eventually she roared off with a couple of little bunny hops thrown in for good measure. It was like watching a novice learner driver but the bunny hopping was due to the fact she was unable to navigate the corner of the car park and keep the jacket up to her face.

      Mick, I have no doubt her version of our chance encounter when relayed to others would have been all bluff and great bravado given the nature of foolish boasters. Her audience would have been entertained with much posturing and exaggeration but only she and I know the absolute truth of what happened on that cold morning in December 2015!! And I have a great tip too Mick. Get yourself a ‘GoPro’ and mount it to your dashboard 🙂

      So yes, alone they are pathetic, spineless and cowardly and we should perhaps pity their lack of courage and self-worth. There could be nothing worse than having to live with those sullen and resentful attributes!

      Lisa, I honestly understand how you must have felt. I have been there and I have been to the absolute depths of despair as you have no doubt been. What happened to me bought about the darkest of times and the very darkest of thoughts but I wish I knew then how recovery, although very slow, is possible. There are many blue skies ahead guys. Please take great care and stay positive. Not all of those in the world are cruel and unkind. I wish you all the very best xx

      1. Mick

        Mate I cannot say how much your message to us has meant. Lisa was over the moon. It is just unreal thank you. Yep, absolute cowards when they are alone. Shitting herself in the carpark and trying to hide. How pathetic hey but that’s how they are. Like you said bet she told a heap of shit to everyone though 🙂 And yep, not everyone is bad. You just have to weed out the bad ones from the good ones. We will get there in the end. Thanks again for all you said. Its just been excellent. Take care of yourself. Love you mate Mick, Lisa and the rug rats

    1. Thank you so much for your comment Fiona. I have no idea why some women choose to do this to other women. I can only assume that much of it is driven by jealousy, spite and their own lack of self-worth. It is a terrible thing to endure and these women cannot begin to comprehend the pain and heartache they inflict. I also believe this is ‘allowed’ to occur because others don’t want to speak up for fear of it happening to them. It is all about self preservation and a survival instinct for some. Take care and have an amazing week x

  9. Just a note to thank you all for your inspiring, extremely honest, insightful and equally heartbreaking comments. Your grace in expressing your experiences and your thoughts on this post have been deeply moving. I will, over the next couple of days, reply to each of you. Again, my thanks to you for taking the time to comment on this distressing issue which seems to be plunging our communities and those we love and care for into such despair. Have a beautiful week xx

  10. Will

    What a post and what a reaction. I was going to say I can’t believe this is happening but then I realised I see it everyday in my workplace. The nasty little games, the freezing out, the bitching, the jealously and the constant back stabbing. So glad I was born a male. BTW you might want to add dragon slayer to your resume which is a pretty cool thing to be and when I get home tonight I am going to ask my daughter if she wants to be a dragon slayer when she grows up and I’ll explain why. Cheers, Will

  11. Thank you for your great comment Will, it is very much appreciated. I can well relate to what you see in your workplace on a daily basis as this is the understructure to how all this began for me. The nasty little snide remarks, the freezing out, the jealousy and the back stabbing. It was almost text book! On a more positive note however, I was so impressed that you went home to ask your daughter that very magical question but that you were also explaining why. Well done to you and just for reference, I have added ‘dragon slayer’ to my qualifications……:) x

    1. Will

      Thank you oceangirl/dragon slayer 😊. Charlotte and I had a great father/daughter talk and I know in my heart she will never be a ‘mean girl’ and I’m so thankful (and very proud) for that. You don’t need those people in your life so no loss at all on your part just theirs. Take care, cheers, Will

  12. Mr Brizvegas

    The fairer & gentler sex. What a joke. Have met some absolute dragons in my lifetime & the worst enemy you can ever have is a jealous woman. They will destroy you & love every moment of it. Mr Brizvegas.

    1. Thank you for your comment Mr Brizvegas. My old stomping ground is beautiful Brisbane as I am a very proud born and bred Queenslander.

      It appears there is a terrible theme with regards to these brutal sorts of women however I can assure all that not every woman behaves in such treacherous and appalling ways. I believe it is a very small minority which destroy all the good that others do but unfortunately their villainous actions outweigh and overshadow, becoming the yard stick by which most women are then measured.

      Trust that most of us are good, kind and fair and dismiss those who fight to bring that ideal down to the lowest of levels. Have a great day x

  13. Phil

    I’m on board all the way for having this sort of behavior dealt with in the courts as a hate crime. I think it is the only way to stop it. Been through this ourselves guys and I tell you what, it is soul and family destroying. Good luck everyone.

  14. Thank you for your great comment Phil. I have to agree that perhaps the only way to stop this persecution and torment is to have it dealt with in the courts. I also believe what we are seeing and hearing about are ‘hate motivated acts’ which in themselves should be deemed a breach of civil law. Hopefully one day soon, and much sooner than later, these despicable acts of taunting and cruelty will be considered a criminal act and therein punishable by law. Stay cool and have a great week x

  15. Phil

    Thanks and well said and fingers crossed to have these crimes, which is what they are, recognised as an act of hate. BTW, forgot to mention earlier that I loved the line about punching them in their fat old vaginas. LOL 😁

  16. Wind Dancer

    Dear Little Brave Heart. You will never be left to stand alone. I am right there next to you with a kindred fighting spirit. Wind Dancer xxx

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